The Race Riot: Real Life Impact

LOL I wrote a blog for work. This is what we agreed to post. It was all me by the way, I just expressed different views and this one was chosen.

When people ask me if I have ever been racially discriminated against, I always give them the honest answer: No. The follow up question largely depends on who is I am having the conversation with. If it’s someone from an ethnic background like myself, they are usually surprised that I have been living in the UK for 20 years and I have never had any racist experience. But I can’t make a racist experience up if I have not had any.

Admittedly, I am a very laid back individual and one of my core philosophy in life is that it is my opinion of whatever happens to me that matters and not the event itself. If I meet a white individual that is being hostile towards me for no apparent reason, I usually just assume they are having a bad day and it has nothing to do with me. Unless they call me the N-word or say something directly about my race, their hostility never bothers me and once our interaction is over, I quickly forget about their existence.

That philosophy went out of the window at the end of July of 2024.

As a father of a 3 year old girl, hearing the news of the young girls that were stabbed to death at a dance class was extremely distressing. I cannot imagine what the parents of those young girls would have been going through, and are still probably going through. For the sake of my own mental health I decided to avoid the news for a couple of days.

I was doing so well until my wife, who I didn’t inform of my decision to bury my head in the sand asked if I’d seen the news.

Nope! Why? What has happened this time?

They are protesting.

Then I turned on the news and well, we all know what happened.

What was already a distressing event took on a darker…more sinister turn. How did we as a society get here? I understand the anger and emotions that comes with learning about the stabbings. Earlier in April, a gentleman wielding a machete hacked a black boy to death in London and I imagine a lot of decent people would have felt angry and distressed but it didn’t result in protests let alone riots.

So what was different this time?

“How do I explain this to my children?” has become a cliché saying that it has now lost the effect it is supposed to invoke. Every parent from an ethnic background dread the day they will have to explain the reality of the world we live in to their kids. Ideally they want to do it on their own terms that is my plan anyway.

AJ, my daughter is 3. She is the sweetest person I have ever met. I know all parents say this about their child, but you just need to meet my daughter once and you will understand what I mean. She is too friendly.  This has been a source of argument between my wife and I because, the idea of a stranger is lost on AJ, she is always going in for the hug/lift. It used to be cute.

Dude, I don’t think AJ should be friendly around people. I once said to my wife

Ope, let her enjoy her innocence, do you want to stop her from being friendly?

Yes, the world is full of people with bad intentions and she needs to start understanding that.

Dude she is three!

I am lucky she is three. Her main source of entertainment are Bluey, Peppa Pig and Gabby’s Dollhouse and as far as I am aware, they don’t have a “Riot” episode. I know people and colleagues that have older children that had to explain, or attempt to explain the riots? Where do you even start from? The thought of me sitting AJ down and explaining concepts like “immigration, islamophobia, dehumanization, racism” fills me with anxiety and yet this is what people from ethnic minority had to do during the riots. One of my colleagues said her and her family couldn’t leave the house for days. Trapped in your own house with 2 kids asking why they couldn’t go out? How do you explain that?

I am ashamed to admit that during the black live matter protests a few years ago, I was happily binge watching my favourite anime (one piece, in case you were wondering). What was going on was too distressing and we were already dealing with COVID, plus I didn’t have a child so I was happy to apply my stoic principle of prioritising my inner equanimity then. Having a child changes you and your outlook on life on so many levels.

We need to do better as a society. We are literally setting an examples for the upcoming generations. Some kids were involved in the riots. A 12 year old boy was charged. Is no one thinking of the children?

For obvious reasons I don’t want to go into my opinion of the root cause of the riots, but It will be remiss of me not to touch on the counter protest. The sheer amount of people that came out to show the handful of unfortunate people rioting and attempting to burn a hotel does not represent the country was heart-warming. And here is hoping that such scenes will not happen again. I don’t believe it won’t though, not if the root cause is not addressed, but I wanted to end the post on a positive note.

AJ will be four soon so I reckon I still have maybe another 4 years of pretending like the world is brilliant and we all get along before I have to have any tough conversation. I guess that is a silver lining…for me anyways.